The End & Forever
by BadWolfIsMe
Summary: Forever was never going to happen. But they managed to cheat the end so many times already.. Now she will come back once more, to hold his hand during his final end. Rating may go up, haven't yet decided where this story will go.x
1. The End

**Hey guys - I'm back!! Sorry I haven't uploaded in AGES, have been in a very not-doctor-who-ish mood for a long time and haven't had anything to write about... As always though, the new episode set me off brimming with ideas and I couldn't help but write this load of drivle! =D  
****Second chapter should be up in a couple of days, but I'm not going to make any promises!  
And yes, I know I should really be finishing other stories rather than starting something new, but (at the minute anyway) I'm pretty happy with this idea and hope you will be too! **

**Don't forget to review! Motivate me to carry on writting because I'm not ready to throw in the towl just yet!!**

**Oh, and I nearly forgot, I hope you all had a wonderful christmas and Santa brought you everything you asked for ;) Did everyone enjoy the new episode... I know I did! Can't wait for NewYear to see the next onee! **

**Right, I best go before I ramble on too much and bore you all to death before you get to read the story! Choww! xo**

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We always knew it was never going to last. We lied to ourselves, and to each other, because it was easier, told each other 'forever' because 'the end' was something neither of us wanted to admit. Originally it was something he always told me, but then it became an eventuality, something we'd face when we came to it. Because I think I changed him. Rather than reminding me the end was always coming, I think he began to believe in forever. But that eventuality came too soon, and in the end neither of us were ready to face it… we didn't see the eventuality like we'd always expected… it came too soon for us to be ready.

But I couldn't let go. So I found a way, the smallest possible gap, and I came back where he said it was impossible. But forever doesn't exist, so how could I be stuck so far away from home forever? When I got back, we hoped we'd be ready for our second end, for we both knew for certain this time, that forever would never happen. But this end came around almost instantly. And now it really was the end. Over. 'Caput' as the Doctor once said to me.

I didn't understand then. Not like I do now. I thought I'd never go back again. But now the end truly approaches, and I will be there. And I can be there because this is not my end. My end came a long time ago when I lost him. I didn't realise. I do now. This is his end. The end of time itself. I'm coming back one last time. And I will be ready this time, I'll be ready for the end. Finally I'll have the strength to say the goodbye we both deserve. It's not fair, of course it's not, but the universe is not fair. I'll be strong for our final run. I'll save him, like he saved me all those years ago. I'll hold his hand once more as he ends, as time and the universe ends with him. And just as he continued without me, I will continue without him, because every universe needs a doctor, and he won't be there forever. Because forever is a myth.

So here I go. I'm coming back to my universe.. To _our_ universe… Because I can hear it calling. And I'll save it. I'll save him. This will be my final ending. And then I'll leave. Like we left so many places. No looking back. No more second chances. I've done all I can. This is the end. Nothing more this time. No hope. Just the end.


	2. Forever

**Hellooo! Should've had this up a while ago but have been stuck with family for the last couple of days without any internet - it was nice but meant that I couldn't update, sorry (: !**

**Okay, these first two chapters are very rambling but I'm thinking that after this I'm going to get stuck into a proper story (but no promises when it's gonna be up!)**

**Thankyou so much to every one of you lovely people who reviewed/favourited/alerted this story already! You're the people who make my day and please continue to review (: **

**Right, that said I'll leave you with something one of my friends put on their facebook after the christmas special episode... His responce to the episode was "Omg, Doctor Who is turning into Nazi propoganda - Blond hair, blue eyes and the end of the human race!" Don't know if it's just me, but that comment made me chuckle! **

**Getting on with it.... Please review! =D xo**

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Forever. TimeLords live forever, or so some understand it. They say we never age, we never die. But we age, just not visibly. And we can die. Regeneration won't save us forever. Humans use the phrase 'forever' far too much without any real understanding of what the word means. Forever is forever. Without an end. And that's where humans go wrong, what they don't understand. Too often humans use forever simply to mean forareallylongtime. But they don't know any better. How could they? Humans have no true concept of forever. When they say the word, the don't really mean never ending. They may think that's what they mean, but it could never be the truth. Everything has it's time and everything dies… everything ends. Eventually, even time itself will end. Before, I would repeat that to myself like a religion. I wouldn't allow myself to hope, to dream, not anymore. Because before that, I has thought that my race would last forever. I could never understand that there would eventually be an end to even time. But without the TimeLords there's nothing to protect time. They ended and so will I, soon. I know my time is nearly over, I can feel it. The Ood said so as well. I, just as everything, will end. There won't be a forever.

For a brief time, I allowed myself to forget, to believe in forever. I knew it couldn't, I knew it would end, but I wanted _that time_ to last forever. I wanted her to make me smile forever. I never told her. How could I? There was always tomorrow, every day I told myself, "I'll tell her tomorrow" because tomorrow was forever. When she was with me, there would never not be a tomorrow. Of course it ended. Nothing is forever, even tomorrow will someday end. But for a while, I let myself forget, let myself imagine forever, just how it could be - how it could never be…

The end came too early. And when we got our second chance it was too late. The end has already come and I'd forgotten our forever. Forgotten how I'd once wanted it to be. I wouldn't let myself believe again. So I let it end once more.

But I'll keep on fighting, in her memory, and in their memory. For while I live on, all I've lost lives on with me. Maybe not forever, but until _my_ end_._


End file.
